Friday, March 26, 2010

Is it 4:30pm yet?

Today has just totally sucked! Well I take that back, work didnt suck, but everything else in my life feels like it sucks right now.

In my last post, I mentioned that I was going to try to stay positive, but apart of me is tried of lying to myself and letting  myself think that everything will be ok...  Have you ever had a friend or family member tell you "dont stress, dont worry, dont think about it, everything will be ok!"? I am personally so tired of hearing these statements! Its not going to get better, because you said that like 5 months ago, its not ok, and dont tell me not to stress! 

Sorry if I am rambling, I just have so much on my mind that I feel like I cant talk about or feel. 

Tuesday night, we had really bad snow storms out here in Colorado, well I ended up crashing into a tree. I smashed the front of my vehicle and needed to be towed and repaired. So I text some of my "friends"/ coworkers to see if they would be able to give me a ride in the morning. The morning came and I didnt hear anything from them, so I was running around trying to get numbers and find a way to work. Luckily, Joey was able to take me in and I later  was picked up my Greeley friend Sara to get a rental.  I found myself angry at the fact that I really needed a friend and she was no where to be found expect in her bed sleeping! Sleeping is great and I am not angry with the fact that she was sleeping but the fact that she texted me stating she wasnt coming into work and then not answering my messages due to the fact that she went back to sleep.  That is fine, but I consider myself a good friend to this person and have helped her so many times, its hard to count and the ONE time I needed her, she is not there for me. WHATEVER.

SO the day goes on and I have to hear from Joey telling me that instead of driving home, the same distance that he drives everyday, twice a day,  he would rather drive to his friends house to drink and play video games. Now normally, I am not a jealous person or possessive or anything of that sort, but he finds more reasons to NOT be at home and help finish the remodeled bathroom he started, than he does to be home, which upsets me. WHATEVER.

Thursday, knowing that Joey would be at his friends, I ask my friend to hang out with me. No, she is busy. Seriously??? Am I not cool anymore or what is the deal??!! That was the second time this week that she is too busy for me and then dealing with Joey being gone, I wanted to crawl into a corner and cry!!!! I tried going to my counselor to just talk to somebody, but somebody else was mad that I wanted to go without them..... In the mist of things, I am waiting for my father to figure out when is a good time for him to move his crap to my house. One minute its this weekend, next minute its next weekend, the next minute its 4 weeks, then back to this weekend, I got to the point where I just wanted to say this is when you can move in and if you dont do it during that time, sorry!!

Now that it is Friday, I am bitchy, I am cranky, I am finding myself kind of emotional, and I am super tired! I want to scream and then scream again.  I am over this week and I am not even excited about this weekend. I have nothing planned and I dont want anything planned but I am so OVER everything that I just want to go to bed and not wake up until at least Oct, when its my bday.... 

For everybody else, have a great weekend and enjoy it!

No comments:

Post a Comment